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The power of a decision

Uncategorized Jun 17, 2019
 

 

 

Many men I hear from are stuck in the "Limbo Land" of a marriage that is spiraling out of control with no resolution in sight...

...Or they may feel trapped in a job or career that is sucking their soul out of their body on a daily basis.

Or they want to speak their truth to somebody so badly it's eating them alive and keeping them in a dark, angry place.

They're stuck. It's hard for them to move and take action.

So, how do you make a hard decision?

How do you break free from the fear of outcome and the fear of someone's reaction?

The answer is to simply make your NEXT decision. Just make it.

Like Nike used to say: Just do it.

Just say it. Just state precisely what you're thinking and what you want.

The act of making a decision ALWAYS CREATES MOVEMENT IN SOME DIRECTION.

The frustration of indecision is caused by the fear that nothing will ever change. But if you decide to create movement...something will change. And if you choose to do nothing...nothing will change.

The most common challenge I hear is, "Yeah, but what if the change I create is something WORSE than I've got right now?!"

My answer is, "Really? You're absolutely miserable right now, and you're afraid of being more miserable?"

We are the creators of OUR OWN misery.

The decision to not make a decision or to change our circumstance is a decision to stay in our current state.

There is usually some hidden benefit we get by deciding to stay in our current state. We get to blame someone. Or we get to stay in certain misery instead of uncertain happiness.

"Without the ability to end things, people stay stuck, never becoming who they are meant to be, never accomplishing all that their talents and abilities should afford them." ~ Dr. Henry Cloud, Necessary Endings

A friend told me to read the book Necessary Endings during my divorce 10 years ago. At first, I was pissed off at the casual suggestion that "some things just need to end."

But I've learned it doesn't necessarily mean your marriage needs to end.

What normally needs to end are the established patterns of thinking, speaking, and behaving.

What needs to end is our chronic level of fear caused by insecurity and emotional immaturity.

(This applies to both sides of a relationship.)

I've learned when a man DECIDES to begin working on his own dysfunctional thinking and behavior, other things start changing immediately.

In other words, when you DECIDE to make clear, deliberate changes in yourself...everything around starts to change to.

And THAT is the movement we need to start feeling like we have more confidence and control in our lives than ever before.

And that is a feeling of liberation.

It's a feeling of freedom to start creating something brand new. And that's where all of your power is.

Stay dangerous,

- DK

PS - If you are stuck, If you are feeling beat down in life or in your marriage, I invite you to make a decision and get some movement going forward.

Find out what I can do for you in this short video.

 

 
 

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