Oh, life in the modern world...
It's almost like there's a vast conspiracy to feminize men, and we've all felt the effects.
Now they're calling masculinity itself toxic.
Let me dispel that right now:
It's not. Don't buy the lie.
I'm hereby giving you permission to roar once in a while. Operate with the approval of no one.
Watch Fight Club. Once a week. For a year.
Remember who you are.
Everyone hears inspirational quotes and sees memes on their social media about "you are enough" and "learning to love yourself" and without context often the words are just words, meaningless platitudes.
Let me give you some context for loving yourself and being enough:
You can't be afraid to lose her (whoever she is).
She can be your wife, your girlfriend, the girl down the street that you pine for from afar.
"She" can be your dream job, money in the bank or something truly priceless and precious beyond words (Like a 2019 Camaro ZL1).
The capacity to let go is what outcome independence is really all about.
We engage in approval seeking in our intimate relationships more than any other place, so that's where I'll focus this discussion.
Here is what I see:
So much focus on "how to get."
We're men after all. We have a male mindset. We conquer, we achieve, we get it done. The mentality works great when you are trying to win a war, build an empire, or clean the garage.
It doesn't work so well in your relationships with women.
The question is always "how do I get her to do respect me, how do I get her to have more sexual desire, how do I get her to see it my way... "
Attraction cannot be negotiated or cajoled. Neither can respect. Or admiration.
Attraction, respect, admiration, all those validating things you want from your wife, your girlfriend, or the cute girl in the next apartment (or perhaps all three at once) come from who you are.
It comes from the vibe that you broadcast 24/7.
No amount of doing the right things or saying the right phrases is going to fundamentally change who you are.
If you haven't transformed on the inside, none of this will work. Women pick up energy. They feel your vibe. They are masters at this. You can't bullshit them. I've tried. The results were laughable.
Focus on your being. Get that right, and you won't have to stress about what to say or what to do. It'll come to you.
And I can hear your question:
"Alright DK, I hear you. I need to stop being insecure and needy and have a dominant non-needy totally awesome beingness that everyone wants to be around and naturally, brings to me the things I wanted anyway...
...So how do it do that?!"
Glad you asked.
It's simple. It's always about the basics.
A very wise man once taught me, in order to be a master, you must master the basics.
What are the basics of being a dominant "alpha" male? What are the basics of being magnetic?
Well, first I'll tell you what it's not:
It's not giving her orders and getting her to comply.
It's not how many orgasms you can give her (although you will -plenty).
It's not how damned good looking you are (though that doesn't hurt).
It's not some strategy. There is a place for knowing what to do and say when, but without having your foundations in place, that will all be fruitless.
It's your internalized beliefs and attitudes that make you "feel" right or wrong to her, attractive or unattractive.
It's your energetic vibration, which is not a metaphor but actual reality.
In fact, you are an energy field, and you can program your energy.
What do you program it with?
You program it with what you put in your mind.
And you can start by emptying the crap from your mind:
Stop watching the news.
Stop watching television, particularly anything that bashes men. But trust me, stop watching television anyway.
Eliminate or at least cut back on social media.
Stop reading or listening to anything that programs you with things you don't want in your energetic field.
Now you can make room for the good stuff.
What's the good stuff?
Read all the books I recommend.
Being the Strong Man a Woman Wants - Eliot Katz
The Way of The Superior Man - David Deida
The Secrets of Female Sexuality by my good friend David Shade (This one will blow your fucking mind)
On right thinking:
Ask, and It is Given - Jerry and Esther Hicks
A Happy Pocketful of Money - David Cameron Gikandi (My all-time favorite)
And listen to really good music.
(And read every one of these artcles and subscribe to the email newsletter in the sidebar - goes without saying!)
Fill your head with good stuff.
You read about quantum physics in Pocketfull of Money, (Which is what that book is REALLY about) then in a new unit of time, you read one of the books on how to be the man, and realize you're just creating yourself anyway.
That's the secret.
It's an upward spiral that all works together.
And it's best done to soul, rhythm & blues or jazz.
I'm just speaking from experience on that one:)
That is how you will become powerful, dominant, complete and needing nothing.
You program yourself for it until it simply becomes who and what you are.
That's how anybody becomes anything.
That's also how assholes become assholes so choose wisely.
PS - There are no shortcuts, but if you're doing the right work, the process is enjoyable.
Send me your questions if you need any clarification. Otherwise, I would suggest you get started.
PPS - In next weeks article, I'm going to share with you the GREATEST program on manifestation that I have ever been exposed to.
It's a series of audios, and I'm going to give it you free. No strings attached. Watch for it next time.
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